This Is How I Text
Yesterday afternoon I was working on the couch during Clara’s nap and Burger snuggled up next to me. In his sleep, he gradually contorted himself into this weird claw-out position.
Had Sherry been sitting near me, I would’ve quietly motioned for her to check out the amusing scene next to me. But she wasn’t. She was in the office and I didn’t want to yell because I thought Burger might move. So I took the above pic on my phone and texted it to her.
I was very proud of myself for a moment. Then I heard a familiar ding-ding! coming from two cushions over.
Oops. So I added one more line to the text-fest…
Anyone else out there #textfailing? Feel free to commiserate. Do we need a texting intervention since we text each other from the same house? Could have been worse. It could have been like the time I sent a text to my mom and sister about buying Sherry a thong. Yeah that was a joke meant only for Sherry’s eyes. And it was mortifying.
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my husband and I sometimes comment on each other’s facebook posts while sitting 4 feet apart on the couch. haha
This. And yes, we might also occaisionally facebook chat with each other when one of us is in the dining room on the laptop and the other is in the office on the desktop.
Chatting on facebook while sitting in the same room is about the only way my hubby and I can have a conversation with 3 loud kids who like to eaves drop while running wild through the room. We find it hilarious. Thank goodness for modern technology.
I used to facebook chat with a colleague in the break room so we could converse without anyone hearing us. It was epic and a great relief in a stressful job.
Oh my goodness I am dying from the bit you shared at the end! Truly mortifying! But don’t feel too bad, in this age of technology and auto-correct we’ve all been there before. This is super embarrassing, but I once texted my dad and apparently asked him about my sister’s penis, when really I was trying to ask for his gardening advice about the pansies we were planting in her front yard. Total fail and I wanted to die, but laughs were had by all at least.
I have a nursing baby, so the iPhone is my best friend. My husband and I have whole conversations via text while I’m in one room and he’s in another. It’s especially useful for making him bring me stuff while I’m otherwise occupied.
Nice text usage! Ten points for that!
xo
s
We do the same thing. I have to hold my baby while she sleeps (she’s the worst sleeper ever, but she’s cute so it’s okay) so I’m constantly texting hubs from the nursery. Usually it’s to beg him for some apple cider but sometimes I see funny quotes on Pinterest and text them to him.
Yep, same! This is what I was coming to post. No way am I moving out from underneath a sleeping baby if it took me a long time to get him there. My husband even got me a tablet for Christmas so I can read the internet and chat with a spacious 7 inch screen.
Aww, whatchu dreamin’ about lil Burger? I would love to know what dogs dream about!
I would love to commiserate on text fails but we don’t text. That’s right. We’re dinosaurs. Our method of communication are post its, Hello Kitty shopping list paper and notebook paper folded 7th grade style in the shape of an arrow. It’s how we roll…or…fold.
Ha!
xo
s
Oh John, you are hilarious! Thanks for the good chuckle. Lucky for me, I do not have a textfailing experience to share, but I love reading about them!
I’ve had a few failed texts in my day :) although thankfully I don’t think I’ve ever texted the wrong person…especially not something embarrassing *knocks on wood*
Love the Burger pics!
LOL! Two weeks ago we were buying something off of Craigslist and we had traveled a decent way from our hometown to get it (husband had to have a kegerator!)…so I stayed in the truck while he went into the craiglist sellers house…well needless to say after like 25 minutes and no sign of my husband I started to get worried, sent him a text asking if everything was ok….and then heard his phone buzzing on the seat of the truck (WHAT!!! how could he go into a strangers house without taking his phone…he was so dorked excited about owning a kegerator that he lost his mind I guess!)…anyway I continued to text his phone ‘yelling’ at him for not taking his phone and how would he be able let me know if we had accidentally found a craigslist killer without his phone! Husband got a pretty big kick out of it later when he finally did check his phone :)
That’s hilarious! He momentarily lost his mind over a kegerator! I love it. So glad he wasn’t kidnapped.
xo
s
Oh John, your thong incident brings up a very unfortunate thong/text incident of my own. A couple years ago, my then-boss who was male, ten years older than me, and married texted me, “Are you available tomorrow evening for something?” and I texted back “No, I have a thing”… EXCEPT I ACTUALLY TEXTED “No, I have a thong.” WANTED. TO. DIE.
Hahahahahaha!
xo
s
MADE MY DAY!
Haha! I also like how Sherry is “Wife” in your phone.
I’m dying over how it’s Wife-Sherry, in case he doesn’t know which wife it is. ;) I actually have that for my hubby in case of emergency and I’m incapacitated, but it still cracks me up.
Don’t feel bad texting Sherry while she was in the house! I had my wisdom teeth out over the summer and couldn’t take for the first day, so I texted my mom whenever I needed something. She was sitting not even three feet away!
Aw man, that’s smart!
xo
s
I did once text “Love you hottie!” to an accquaintace of mine… there were two Sams in my phone. One was my now-husband, one was someone I knew far less well. It could have been worse–yours totally was!
Hahaha, that’s pretty funny!
xo
s
First week on the job. I replied too quickly to an email, saying I would ADD something. Only, the S key is right next to the D key… so instead I told my boss (an older woman, grandmother to boot) that I would A** it. Classic.
Oh man.
xo
s
True story: my husband calls me via facetime from two rooms over at my house. Not sure why since I can hear him real time and with a 2 second delay via phone…ha!
Hahahah!
xo
s
This happens to me all the time. Both the goofy dog positions and my boyfriend’s phone being right next to me while he’s in the other room.
And Raleigh’s goofiest/favorite position is on his back, legs up, c-shape, tongue hanging out. He’s such a dork!
hahaha! LOVE IT! I got the flu w/ our little one. So the two of us were in the bed and the hubby was in the living room. We live in a tiny rancher, but my voice was gone so I totally called him to say I needed tylenol. Glad we aren’t the only ones to call from 1 or 2 rooms over. LOVE IT!!
Hahahaha….well at least the moment was forever captured!
I love that fur :)
When my son was first born, my husband and I text all the time from within the same apartment. Mostly because I would be nursing or the baby would be napping on one of us and we would need something (a drink, the remote, a brownie) and it was just easier to text than to risk waking the baby. What did people do before texting??
I know, right?!
xo
s
My husband has the best textfail/autocorrect story ever – he was texting the pastor at our church, updating him on a class to our youth group at church (13-18 year olds). He intended to write – “I think the kids are enjoying Ecclesiates” (a book in the Old Testament), it auto-corrected to “I think the kids are enjoying crazy ass tease”. Thank Heaven, literally, he caught it before he sent it out.
Oh my goodness! That’s the craziest auto correct ever!!
xo
s
Yeah, I’m completely non-operational, the hopelessly lost and out-of-the-times person young adults dread being around.
BUT I do want to live with my times, maybe actually buy a cell phone (told you I was non-operational) and learn the ins and outs of it all.
Do you have a sort of dictionary of cellphone etiquette? An Emily Post for smartphone users? Given what I see my students do, it is a matter of some concern. I mean, I don’t want to be sending parents of students any messages about thongs… (remember when that used to mean sandals?)
Love your ability to laugh about that, by the way!
Hahahah! Someone needs to write a Smart Phone Manners book!
xo
s
In Australia thongs still do mean sandals – it’s only when talking with overseas people that we need to clarify our meaning (usually after a confused look, raised eyebrows or a ‘what?!’ from the person we’re talking to.)
Your post reminded me of college and AIM instant-messaging your roommate who was sitting at the desk right next to yours so you could do homework and make weekend plans at the same time! And I must admit, we are also guilty of the Facebook-commenting-while-sitting-on-the-same-couch syndrome! :-)
Lol at that thong text…wow. Definitely have to double check the recipients on those sketchier texts to the wife.
I’ve seen a few posts now where you post a screen shot of text messages. How do you get that clean image to post on the blog?
We just take a screen shot on our iphone. Wish we had a secret, but that’s it. Haha.
xo
s
Emily, only iPhones have that capability (as far as I know). My Samsung Nexus S does not offer the option to take a screenshot of the phone. Then, the iPhone owner can simply send the image via email or connect the phone to the computer via USB cable to download the screenshot image to his/her computer and upload for all the world to see. :)
I’m guessing what Emily is asking is how to take a screen shot of her phone. On an iphone if you hit the home and the sleep button at the same time it’ll capture the screen as a photo.
Oh yes, thanks Emily!
xo
s
I can do it on my HTC Desire, it’s definitely a fairly common feature. On mine you take the screenshot with the lock and home buttons pressed together.
heh, do you have to label all your wives? “Wife – Sherry” “Wife – Susan” “Wife – Jenny” to keep them all straight? jk
Haha! We read somewhere that it’s good to label people for emergencies (so if a stranger grabs your phone looking for your wife’s number he’ll see it). It does look pretty funny though!
xo
s
I noticed the naming clarity as well and have heard it’s a good idea! I actually had a stranger find my phone in a puddle once and call my husband to give it back to us. It was good that he figured out who my husband was though because I had just labeled him “Loveybod” in my phone. Haha. We asked him how he figured out who to call and he said he just called the most recently called number back, in case we had tried to call the lost phone. So smart!
Nice move! I love how you have Sherry in your phone as “wife – Sherry”. Is it in case you forget the name of your wife or your relation to that ominous “Sherry”? :D
I didn’t have any embarrassing text-stories as I’m a sloooow texter (have an old phone, where you have to punch the numbers), but I saved my home no. as “Panama” because of a children’s book “Oh how nice is Panama”. It’s about two friends wanting to move to Panama, essentially walking in a circle (with a few adventures on the way), coming back to their now “aged” old home, not recognising it but thinking “This is perfect, this must be Panama” and moving happily back in.
Too funny! I often send my husband pictures of our sleeping/playing/cuddling dog. I don’t work on Tuesdays and he does…so he’s often inundated with pictures from me! As for the texting thing…my husband’s name is Rob and I also work with college students who frequently text/call me so I have their numbers too. That means there are currently 3 different Robs in my phone…and I know more than once I’ve sent a text to the wrong one…or SUPER panicked and had to doubled/triple check myself to make sure I didn’t send my college students a text that was meant for husband’s eyes only! Eek! What a nightmare to show up to work the next day if THAT happened!
LOL at the thong fail. That’s so hot. Heh…
I just text failed the other day. I read about how Taylor Swift was shafted at some award ceremony and I sent a text (I thought) to my sis-in-law with a link to the article and saying, “Why is everyone SO mean to Taylor?? Do people honestly think these ‘jokes’ don’t hurt? Ugh.” A few minutes later my hubby replied, “Who’s Taylor?” LOL!
Hahahahah! You guys are cracking us up!
xo
s
My now husband sent me a text saying : I send you a long kiss!! but he sent it to someone else, someone from his office, this other woman whose name started with an L too.
Hahah!
xo
s
I’ve texted my husband from the floor below him before, to tell him breakfast was ready. We also text each other in a store if we get separated. I think most people are pretty forgiving for text fails because it’s so common, and easy to do with autocorrect, etc. out there.
I can relate! A while back I texted my husband to tell him he had a hot butt, only to realize I sent it to a male coworker. Very awkward trying to explain that it wasn’t meant for him by texting. lol. oops!
I also like how her profile is “Wife – Sherry.” In case you forget, right? :P
We’re totally guilty of texting from the next room in our house, too. You’re not alone!
Ugh. So, one of my gal pals was dating a guy our entire group did not like. He was rude to her, to us and we all knew he was in the relationship for one thing: her cupcakes. And, by cupcakes, I actually mean cupcakes…she’s an incredible baker and she was opening her own shop.
Anyway, so we were group texting and talking about Christmas plans. I replied and said, “I hope S doesn’t bring that jerk R with her. I’m sick of acting like it’s okay to be 32 and still sleep on Star Wars sheets. Over it.”
Next text reply, from her. She just politely tells me that’s also on the group text.
Following text reply, from him. He corrected me and said it was just a Star Wars quilt.
*face plant for days*
Always make sure you know who is copied on a group text. Moral of the story. )
Oh mannnn!
xo
s
Haaaaaahahaha! This one is the best/worst. I would have DIED.
I recently went back to work part time after having my son. I work in the evenings so I bring the baby to work and my husband picks him up and takes him home when he is finished work.
After they left I texted my husband to remind him to record the baby’s poop diapers in our total baby app (side note: I purchased this app based on your reccomendation in one of your Clara posts and its awesomesauce).
Long story short..I texted this to my boss instead of my husband. Luckily, he was understanding.
Hahahahahahahah!
xo
s
I literally laughed out loud so hard. This is one of my favorite posts ever. Ha ha! Thanks for the mid-week chuckle.
Once my hubster left his keys in my car. I texted him to let him know, then noticed his phone next to the keys. Womp womp.
… so his text thread looked something like “Your keys and wallet are in my car.” “…and so is your phone.”
Ha!
xo
s
My friend’s boyfriend had his wisdom teeth pulled out and I texted her “How’s big willy feeling?” (our not so creative nickname for our short friend Will) By accident sent that to my aunt and immediately felt the need to explain. Somehow the explanation made it look like an even more suspicious text re: my fiance’s anatomy…
Hahahahahhaahahahahah!
xo
s
We have two parrots who like to yell when it’s okay. “Okay” is usually when they are outside or when we’re singing. When I yell to my husband in another room, they think that’s the green light to yell with me, so we often text from room-to-room.
Hahah, that’s so funny!
xo
s
During our move, I was trying to text both our moving van driver and my husband. I accidentally texted the driver “I love you” and promptly received a call from his WIFE wanting some answers. Ooops!
Eeks!!
xo
s
I must admit that I have texted my husband from bed (I sleep about an hour later than him while he gets up to have his coffee).
Also, I’m sure your mom and sister eventually (maybe?) got a kick out of that. In college I once attempted to respond to an e-mail from my mom about my grandmother, inside of which we both had called her an unfortunate name, but instead of replying I had forwarded to my grandmother. …….#nowords. :(
In the days of actual hard-copy printing of universty course catalogs, I typed “pubic administration” instead of “public administration”. You guessed it, no one caught the error and it went to print. Class filled up during mail-in registration.
Oh man! Haha.
xo
s
In Washington state, one county (mine) received our “pubic voter’s registration card” via mail. Yep, all 256,000 registered voters have that on our card. It was too costly for the county to mail out new ones so we just giggle when we voted at our polling places. Now WA has every voter in the state vote by email so we no longer have voting booths. No pubic places for us anymore!!
Coincidentally, this past spring I sent out a press release for our “Pubic Conference.” A local reporter emailed me about it, and I honestly didn’t see anything wrong until he spelled it out for me. It was mortifying.
HAhah!
xo
s
Here’s what’s pretty freakin’ weird – just as I was reading this blog post, unbeknown to my husband who is currently sat across the room from me, I was rudely interupted by a text… from said husband!!!
Hahahahahh! Nice!
xo
s
Ha my man and I sometimes text each other when we’re both home but in different rooms. I know other people who do as well. It can be convenient!!
Please divulge the details about the thong text mix-up?? :D
I don’t remember the exact wording now, but my sister and mom were texting me to get birthday or Christmas gift suggestions for Sherry. I was at Home Depot (are you surprised?) without Sherry so I meant to text her to ask what she wanted – joking that if she didn’t respond I’d just tell them to get lots of sexy underwear. But the message went to my mom and sister instead. Oops!
-John
LMAO!! Nice! :-D
I don’t have a text fail (yet) but I do have an email fail from a few years ago.
At my brand new job, I sent a quick email to my boyfriend-now-husband (or so I thought) asking what he wanted for dinner and ended it with “I LOVE YOU!!!!!” I hit send and IMMEDIATELY noticed that I sent it to a coworker with the same first name as my husband.
I quickly sent an apology and explained what happened. All my coworker sent back was “love you too” Haha!! It’s been a long standing joke at my expense :)
Not really a text fail, but when I call my parents for a chat they’re usually in two different parts of their house – Mom in their 2nd floor bedroom and Dad in his basement mancave. When I’m done having a conversation with one, instead of them taking the phone to the other or screaming for them to pick it up, they make me hang up and call back so the other parent will (hopefully) pick up. ;P
No intervention needed. My roommate and I frequently texted each other when we’re in different rooms and we live in a small apartment. On second thought, maybe my roommate and I need a texting intervention…
That’s ok, I’ve had incidences where I’m talking to someone on the phone as I’m trying to leave the house and I say “Oh, hang on a second, I can’t find my phone! Now where is that darn thing…” Then I’m reminded by the person I’m talking to that it’s in my hand and I’m talking on it. :)
Been there…done that!!
Done that! I was talking on the phone to my husband frantic because I had to leave and I couldn’t find the phone! He asked me which phone did I call him on…. oh right. doh!
My fiance and I are totally guilty of texting pictures of our sleeping cat to each other while under the same roof. Glad to know we’re not the only ones who thinks their sleeping pet’s poses are hilarious!
We totally text each other while at home, too. I’m notorious for going to bed first and then immediately thinking of something I forgot to mention/ask earlier. So instead of getting back up 30 seconds after laying down, I text!
I had a really weird autocorrect once. I sell a line of wedding jewelry and I was having a friend come over to model some pieces. I was trying to tell her to wear a white blouse in case part of her shoulder was in a shot, but it somehow turned into “if you could wear a lazer.” That’s not even close, iPhone! For shame.
Hahah! Lazer = hilarious.
xo
s
I went from a desk job and getting paid every two weeks, to being a school teacher and only getting paid once a month. It was a huge adjustment, obviously. When I got my first paycheck, I excitedly texted my mom “I got paid!”, but my phone autocorrected it to “I got laid!” and I sent it before I realized it. #facepalm
Hahahahahhaahah!
xo
s
Don’t feel bad about texting room to room–
During my junior year of college I lived in one of those apartments that is almost a modified dorm (huge kitchen/ living room in center with four bedrooms/bathrooms off the center. I was in the far left corner by the living room, my best friend in the near right one (next to the kitchen). We would often instant message (remember AIM???) back and forth from our own rooms because our roommates were crazy.
What totally made it was that the text conversations always stayed separate from real life. For example, we might be IMing and she’d ask a question, I would be hungry, tell her to wait a second, and go to get food, i.e. walk right past her door. Sometimes I would stop and say hi, we would chat have a full OTHER conversation, I would go back to my room and THEN continue on the original IM conversation. and answer her question. This happened way more than often then I care to admit.
Looking back now the whole thing is hilarious, but at the time it seemed perfectly normal.